BIOGRAPHY - ARI JOHN WHITE WOLF OFFICIAL SITE

Growing up I was forever attracted to music. My older Step brother and sister were into piano and guitar. There also was a full rock band in the next block. It was a wonderful escape for me from my reality.

We would hold talent shows in my backyard for all the kids to come and do a number. Later I would embrace Dance. I could never sit still even as a young adult. Some sort of beat was in my head forcing my feet to tap out the movements.

Every once in a while. You meet someone who was spectacular, an outstanding citizen. That was my mentor Marco. He was married to a prima donna wife. They had a beautiful daughter, she died of a brain tumor. They were in a local band together for a while. Then the Italian Princess broke it off with Marco. It devastated him. She had a history of infidelity with him. My song Figure Five is about him.

I served in the United States Marine Corps. My Military Occupation Service was 1811 Tank Crewman. I really enjoyed the Marine Corps. At the time of my discharge. I was a Rifle Expert, and Pistol Sharpshooter.

I enjoyed the challenge that the marines gave me. I worked hard at being as good as possible. I struggled a great deal. In Boot Camp, I reacted to the smallpox vaccine. It made me very sick. To this day I am dealing with disability issues. I also had several injuries that still cause me tremendous pain.

After two years in service I was outed. A guy had broken into my gear. He found a journal that I was writing. I was trying to figure out my sexuality. In it contained graphic details. This was long before Don't ask, Don't tell.

It really shouldn't matter if someone in the military is gay. There are other Nations whose military have Gay Soldiers. They do just fine.

I was Discharged with a General Under Honorable Conditions Discharge. The reason for Discharge on my DD-214 is Homosexuality.They held back my promotion, and Good Conduct Medal Award.

At Various times in my life. I would attempt relationships with women. I would eventually Marry a Woman Marine. We didn't last very long. I was fairly depressed at this time. A Marine is told that once a marine, always a marine. Then all of a sudden, I wasn't allowed to be a Marine any more. The Proudest thing I had ever done. Now was my most shameful secret.

There was often incidents of abuse in the marines. When I was outed. Fellow Marines, now were my sworn enemy. Often Threats were made along with the physical incidents. I had to move off of base to stay safe.

The abuse that I suffered in the Marines. Was fairly difficult to deal with. When I came back from leave of absence. To discover that I had been outed. My soul sank to an all time low. I felt like a deer in a headlight. I didn't know who was cool. Because anyone who was. Wouldn't admit it. Otherwise people might think that they were gay.

When I got out of the Marines. I was miserably ill. I would go to the Veteran's Hospital in Madison. I was physically sick. They kept running blood tests. Trying to prove that I was HIV Positive. Because I was gay. Gay people get other Diseases besides STD's.

For a few years I would self medicate with alcohol and drugs. The whole while denying myself much pleasures in life. Yes I did date some men, and some women. We would never get to far in our relationships. I was to much of a mess to be with.

I would end up in several dysfunctional relationships. The longest one was for around eleven years. He knew how to manipulate me. He would make my ptsd flair ups even worse. He was a very abusive controlling man.

In November 2006, I was arrested. My partner/s were violent with me. I couldn't take it and threw some things. Then I left the house. They called the police on me. Had me arrested on the street in the town of my youth. I couldn't beleive that I was arrested after being physically assaulted. I still have a difficult time with police and the cars they drive.

I spent three days in jail. I had no clothes and was wrapped in a padded outfit. The lights overhead was on for 24 hours a day. I was on suicide watch. The jail was extremely unsanitary. There was feces and urine stains on the walls. I didn't eat much for the entire three days. That is how long they kept me in jail.

I was having very difficult times after that. My PTSD was now flared up high. I was hyper vigilant. Always making sure that the route ahead was safe. I was stuttering and stammering words. I was shaking furiously. Friends begged me to go to the hospital. So I went to the Veteran's Pysch Ward.

After I got out of the Hospital. I decided to start playing music again. To deal with the tremendous physical, and emotional pain I was in. I have been performing for a year now. I had always done performances growing up. So playing guitar was relatively easy. I'm not an overly complicated guitarist. That is ok. My voice is what people like the most. So the guitar is there for simple rhythm.

I have always been an artistic person. I loved drawing and painting when I was a kid. I thought that Picasso was awesome. In my later years, I learned to carve on wood. I enjoy that medium a lot. I also do paintings, they usually help me deal with the heavy stuff in my life.

This last year has been a whirlwind of experiences. A fun thing for me is to film local talent. Then I put them up on YouTube.com. The project is called Red Dragon Free Press. It has been a real trial and error experience. I thought that some awesome shows were recorded. But found them to be empty at times. I've gotten better at this.

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In all these years. I have dedicated myself to study. I read any esoteric literature I can find. I have read many versions of the Christian Bible. The Jewish and Muslim Bibles. The Baghavad Gita. Tao and Earth beliefs. I am amazed at the similarities among them all. Today I have come to the conclusion that I am Interfaith. I know that I am called to Ministry. I also know I won't be leading any Churches.

My goals for 2007, was to seek help in three areas. Physical, and Mental, and Spiritual Well being. I know that things will get better in time. I am continuing on with this mission in 2008.

I asked some people at my Interfaith Church. To pray or meditate for me. So that I could find a name to go by. Leaving the old man behind once and for all. Funny thing is the Music Directors wife, Anya. Said "'Pete and I felt impressed that it should be a Native American Name." I kind of blushed, and told her that I had gone as white wolf. Her eyes got very wide. She said "that is what we thought your name should be." So I guess I shouldn't fight something that came to me in prayer a really long time ago. Return to the center and a problem goes away.

I do have to say. Sometimes I have wondered why I am here. Others it all seems so clear. If I didn't have my Faith. I would not be here today. I would have already ended it. Yes, I hurt twenty four hours a day from head to toe. I totally accept that I also have some mental health issues. Here is what I do not accept. That I will be like this forever. Every day is a new experience. Spirit is my best friend. During all those times mentioned before. If I called on Spirit. I felt like I was given a huge hug from above. No one can take that away from me. Even in the most chaotic times of my life. I have always known the presence of the great Spirit.

My hopes and dreams are to live on a nice rural piece of property. Creating a retreat for people to come and recharge. As well as a humanitarian animal shelter. Euthanasia only if the animal is already suffering and dying.

I haven't always been the model of Integrity. But I am doing my best. To connect with that virtue. Knowing that only through this process. Does one truly succeed. It is a work in progress that is for sure. Someday I will get there. But for now I'm gonna just sing until it doesn't hurt anymore. Who knows maybe pain never truly goes away.

My latest Project, Red Dragon Free Press. Has made me a producer, Sound Man, and Videographer. I am also a historian. Archiving the Videos that are filmed. Creates a record of historical moments. A moment in time permanently captured before it disapears from memory forever. Recently I cleared the video archives. Very soon, I shall begin filming and editng short films again.